Nikkei_Simmer Sims Archive Blog: September 2018

Thursday, September 20, 2018

Attacking Connor Frio - A Makeover from the POV of a XY Chromosome.

Connor, Connor, Connor, can you adopt a more boring expression than this? Nope, this ain't going to do.

First of all, let's fix that vomit-green roots...by picking a hair color that suits you or at least comes close to what you had...and then get rid of that rat's nest that you call hair...with something a little more organized and neat. Just because you're taken doesn't mean that you shouldn't dress to impress. For heavens sakes...man, have a little pride in yourself. Don't you wanna look nice for your wife?

Then...let's bring out those eyes of yours and we're leaving your eyes alone in terms of shape - they'll be fine once we stick some cc eyes on you. Oh...and goodbye old ratty clothes. You look like you slept in a dumpster! And I'm not going to even mention your brother who looks like a rejected greaser from the 50s. Don't worry, Connor, HE'S NEXT. I promise, I'll be gentle.

Ah...there, you're starting to look better already.

Good heavens, Connor, you have the fashion sense of a bridge-troll...or maybe like me, the Watcher. Luckily YOU can afford these NICER clothes so that you can actually IMPRESS Fiona. Me, I'm getting old and I don't care. You on the other hand are a YOUNG sim. Get your head in the game, son.

Good God, Connor, what the hell is it with you and those ugly steel-grey jeans that you're wearing. Those went out in the 80s. Did you haul them out of the Goodwill dumpster?

There...that looks better. BLUE jeans...not grey cast-offs. What, you think you're David Hasselhoff or somethin'? Trust me, you don't look a thing like him.

Your eyes are looking a bit bloodshot, you tie one on or something. Too much at the juice-bar?

Yeah, you're shocked? I'm shocked too...You cleaned up somewhat nicely.

OK...you look somewhat presentable, Connor, now get the hell out of here and go impress Fiona. Tell her she's next after I get through with that retrobate Jared. OK OK...I won't hurt him, I promise. Maybe a few bruises here and there, but...OK OK...no bruises either...

Bah, Connor, you're no fun at all...